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How to teach teenagers about spiritual habits that last

We all recognize that teenagers are creatures of habit. They wake up at the last possible second, grab the same snack every day after school, and somehow manage to rewatch the same three shows on Netflix endlessly. But when it comes to spiritual habits, consistency can feel impossible. Most students want to grow in their faith, but they don’t always know how. And as youth pastors, we can sometimes fall into the trap of teaching why spiritual habits matter without showing students how to actually develop them. So let’s fix that. Here’s how to teach teenagers about spiritual habits in a way that sticks beyond youth group.

1. Start Where They Are, Not Where You Want Them to Be

Most of our students aren’t rolling out of bed at 6 AM for a deep dive into Leviticus. They’re scrolling TikTok before their feet hit the floor. Is that the healthiest morning rhythm? Maybe not. But it’s definitely reality. So instead of overwhelming them with a “do everything at once” spiritual disciplines plan, start where they are:

  • If they’re already listening to music every day, introduce them to worship playlists.
  • If they like journaling, challenge them to write one takeaway from their Bible reading.
  • If they’re on social media constantly, encourage them to follow Christian influencers who actually point to Jesus.

Small habit shifts are more sustainable than expecting them to completely revamp their routine overnight. They are just teenagers, after all. And they have their entire lives ahead of them for the Holy Spirit to continue to turn their hearts more and more toward the Lord.

2. Teach Spiritual Habits as a Relationship, Not a To-Do List

We systematize everything as ministry leaders. We almost can’t help ourselves. It’s part of trying to track spiritual growth or report back to the church board. We want to celebrate wins. That’s probably why we unintentionally make spiritual disciplines so…discipliney…when it comes to our teenagers. But, and we know this already, spiritual disciplines aren’t about checking boxes; they’re about cultivating a relationship with God. So instead of saying:
“You need to read your Bible every day, or you’ll drift from God.”

Try this:
“When we spend time in Scripture, we learn to recognize God’s voice, just like you recognize a close friend’s voice in a crowded room.”

If we can help students discover their compelling reasons to spend time in God’s Word on their own, they probably won’t need to be bribed or guilted into doing it. And, for what it’s worth, we see this reflected in the gospel. In Christ, we’re instructed not to hyper focus on our sin, but to consider ourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. In other words, our motivation isn’t guilt and shame, it’s joy and fulfillment. A gospel lens leads us to live the way we were created to because it’s just better. And when our eyes are fixed on how walking with Jesus is just better, we don’t need to hyper fixate on checklists and accountability.

So let’s see if we can’t help students lean into the relationship aspect of developing spiritual disciplines.

3. Help Students Identify Their Biggest Excuse

When students say, “I just don’t have time,” they’re lying to themselves. Most of them do have time. We all do. They just don’t think of spiritual habits as part of their normal life. So there are other things they’ve prioritized over spending time with Jesus. The following is going to sound like a guilt trip. It doesn’t have to be presented that way. It’s just…sometimes when we’re actually faced with the objective truth, it reframes things for us in a helpful way. So have your students take a 30-second reality check:

  • How much time did you spend on TikTok yesterday?
  • How long did you play video games?
  • How much time did you spend talking to friends?

Most students will realize they do have time to spend with God. It’s more so that they haven’t prioritized spiritual growth. But it’s probably the case that many of the students in your youth group want to grow spiritually, so frame this up as reinvesting some of their time into something more worthwhile.

4. Make Bible Reading Approachable

Many students avoid reading the Bible because they don’t know where to start. You might have a few rockstar students who have never skipped an AWANA in their life. But odds are you have at least a handful of students who are pretty new to navigating a Bible. Here’s how to break the intimidation factor:

  • Give them a reading plan – Hand them a simple, short-term plan (like one chapter a day from John).
  • Teach them the “Look, Book, Took” method – What do I see? What does it mean? How do I apply it?
  • Encourage group accountability – Have students check in with each other.
  • Normalize questions – Let students know it’s okay if they don’t understand everything.

5. Use Real-Life Examples of Prayer

If you ask a room of teenagers, “Who struggles with prayer?”, half the hands will go up. The other half won’t put their hands up, but most of them won’t for the same reason they rarely volunteer to pray out loud at youth group: they’re embarrassed. See all teenagers know they’re supposed to pray, but many feel like they’re doing it wrong. As youth leaders, we know how silly that is. There are layers to effective prayer, but the basics of praying is just talking with God. So here’s how to make prayer feel real to the young people in your youth ministry:

  • Break the stereotype – Prayer isn’t just kneeling with hands folded. It can happen anywhere (driving, walking, during sports).
  • Teach different styles of prayer – Conversational prayer, journaling, praying Scripture, listening.
  • Encourage “text-length” prayers – Let students start with short, real prayers throughout the day instead of forcing 10-minute prayer sessions.

If you want to teach teenagers spiritual habits like prayer, the key is to make it natural, not a chore.

6. Connect Fasting to Their World

Fasting is one of the least practiced spiritual habits among students, but not because they don’t care. They just don’t understand it. And, to be fair, a lot of us adults don’t totally understand fasting either. It’s becoming increasingly rare (at least in my church context) to hear of people fasting from food. Although, if you’ll allow me a rabbit hole moment, I guess not hearing that people are fasting from food could just mean they’re fasting from food with the right attitude. So, I don’t know. I’ll have to untangle that mystery another day.

The point is, we owe it to our students to attempt to reframe fasting in a way that makes sense to them:

  • Social Media Fast – Give up Instagram for a week and replace that time with prayer.
  • Music Fast – No secular music for a day. Listen only to worship music and reflect on how it impacts them.
  • Meal Fast – Skip one meal and spend that time reading Scripture.

They don’t need to start with three days in the wilderness. Admittedly, though, most of us probably have a student or two that we wish we could toss into the wilderness for a few days! But no, what’s far more helpful for a teenager is encouraging them to take small steps in fasting. Such small steps make a big impact. I can’t tell you how neat it’s been partnering with some of my students every year in giving up something for Lent. Giving up coffee was brutal for both me and the 11th grader I partnered with, but going through that experience together was really neat, and they felt closer to God during it.

7. Don’t Just Teach It—Model It

Speaking of which, if we teach teenagers spiritual habits but they never see us practicing them, we lose credibility. Are we opening our Bible before opening our phone? Do we talk about our personal struggles with spiritual discipline? Are we showing students that these habits aren’t just for real life and not just youth group?

None of us will ever be perfect examples of this. It’s becoming increasingly difficult for the average Christian to undistract ourselves long enough to spend quality time with God every day. But when we can point to moments in our own devotionals that led to us growing, having peace, or taking a risk we otherwise wouldn’t have taken, it goes a long way in encouraging our students to begin building up their own spiritual habits.

Bragging is stupid. I’m not suggesting that. But the best part of being a youth pastor is being the example for students of what it looks like to love Jesus. It’s a beautiful and holy calling. So don’t hide who you are. Let them see our own pursuit of Jesus, not just hear about how they should be better in theirs.

My Personal Example

For example, several years ago I went through something very difficult. As I stood up to teach in youth group a few days later, I was an emotional wreck. And I was furious with God for what He’d allowed to happen to my family. Rather than fake it, I decided to be authentic and curve the message toward where I was at spiritually in that moment. I told my students I was angry with God. I cried the entire way through the message. I explained what had happened to my family. I ended the message without praying out. I told them to just go to small groups because I didn’t want to talk to God at the moment.

They didn’t go to small groups. Not right away at least.

Because one of my adult small group leaders led our youth group to surround me, and my students prayed over me and wept with me. It was powerful. I got emails about it from parents. Good emails.

I know that’s not exactly letting them see my spiritual habits, but it’s a reminder that our authenticity matters. Students crave it. So don’t hide.

8. Make It a Journey, Not a One-Time Talk

Spiritual habits don’t stick because of one good sermon. They stick because students are invited into a process. Repeat key themes throughout the year. Follow up with students about their growth. Celebrate wins (big and small). This is ultimately about helping teenagers love Jesus more. And when that happens? The habits follow.

Want a done-for-you teaching series that helps students build lifelong faith habits? Check out Invitations—a four-week series designed to help students connect with God in new ways.


Related Posts:

How To Teach Teenagers About Identity In Christ
Choosing The Best Youth Ministry Curriculum For Your Church
Check out Invitations – a Shop series that helps students build lifelong faith habits

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