Knowing Your Worth in Youth Ministry
Maybe it was the first time your pastor didn’t make eye contact with you while praising the rest of the
I was 5 years old when I decided to follow Jesus. Also, I was 8 years old when I decided to follow Jesus. Furthermore, at 11 years old I decided to follow Jesus. And the summer I turned 14, I turned a corner and began to follow Jesus.
Yep. I was totally that Christian kid who got saved every few years growing up. And some of your students are, too. Which is why it’s super important we talk about this. Because in youth ministry, we use the phrase “follow Jesus” all the time. But if you asked your students, “What does that actually mean?” how would they answer? You’d probably hear things like, “It means believing in God,” or “It means going to church,” or even, “It means being a good person.” While none of those responses are completely off base, they also don’t reflect the full picture of what Jesus calls us to. So there’s perhaps nothing more important for us to do as youth leaders than to teach teenagers to follow Jesus.
Let’s talk about how.
If you grew up in church, it’s important to pause here and appreciate what it meant to you and your friends to “follow Jesus” back in the day. I’m sure that, as an adult now, you look back and see some obvious cracks in the armor of your adolescent walk, but there are also probably some flaws you still don’t see even to this day.
That’s because none of us has this following Jesus thing completely figured out. Some of us are phenomenal at reading the Bible, but awful at connecting with God through worship. We can share our faith with a stranger, but have trouble living it out toward an estranged relative. Theology is fun for us, but sacrificial generosity is not. I don’t highlight these flaws to shame you. I just think before we talk about how to teach teenagers to follow Jesus, we come to appreciate that some students are going to have particular strengths and weaknesses in their Christianity no matter what we teach them. It was true of us back in middle and high school. It’s true of us now. Surely, it’ll be true of our students.
So with that chipper little aside as a backdrop, let’s dive into it.
A lot of students believe in Jesus in the same way they believe in gravity: it exists, but it doesn’t really shape their everyday decisions. They might identify as Christians or say they believe in God, but they don’t see that belief changing how they treat people, how they make choices, or how they face challenges. Jesus made it clear in Luke 9:23 that following Him involves denying yourself and taking up your cross daily. It’s not just about knowing the gospel—it’s about submitting your whole life to it.
To help students connect those dots, talk through what real surrender looks like. Use examples that contrast believing something with actually living it out. Invite them to reflect on whether their faith is something they’re simply claiming—or something they’re allowing to shape every area of their life. And doing this may occasionally leave students feeling inadequate. But the goal is never to shame students into the Kingdom; it’s just that we have to challenge them from time to time on whether they’re still trying to operate in the driver’s seat of their life.
I can recall being 15 years old and attending a youth retreat. There’s not much I remember about the sermons. I do remember a whole lot about paintball and cute girls, but that’s neither here nor there. There is, though, one thing that stuck with me from what the guest speaker said during one of the sessions. As we were talking through John 11:35, the speaker said “Jesus wept for an unsurrendered people.” His point was that, yes, He wept over Lazarus. But He also wept for the people He came to redeem who were unwilling to submit. And it always struck me that me being in control of my own life is so sad to God-made-flesh that He would weep over it.
I’m not even totally sure I would preach that John 11:35 text that way now, being a pastor in my own right. But it got my attention, and my life has been a journey of surrender since. We owe it to our students to draw their attention to the importance of surrender.
Tap here to check out Youth Group Lessons on Calling & Surrender.
Teenagers are busy. Between school, friends, sports, jobs, and social media, their lives are packed—and often, Jesus ends up just being one more thing on a long list. But following Jesus isn’t about squeezing Him into our schedules when it’s convenient. It’s about making Him the foundation that everything else rests on.
That sounds like judgment, perhaps. But it isn’t meant to be. When we can help students see Jesus as central to the way they think, live, and operate, Christianity will become far less of a grind for them and significantly more joy-filled. I know in my own ministry, the students who seem to operate with greater clarity and peace are the students who have a strong grasp of the gospel, not just moralistic independence with some Jesus slapped on top.
So start by helping students evaluate what really drives their decisions. What are they prioritizing with their time and energy? From there, talk about what it looks like to build a life that’s centered on Jesus. That doesn’t mean quitting their teams or stepping away from responsibilities, but it does mean learning how to bring Jesus into every one of those spaces. Help them understand that faith is the framework through which they live and move and make choices. The gospel is their lens for life.
Following Jesus can quickly become a list of do’s and don’ts if we’re not careful. Even when we assure students that faith is about belief, sometimes the way we communicate living out your faith downplays the belief part. This is part of the reason why we need to highlight the core beliefs that hold students back from following Jesus.
Teenagers don’t lie for no reason. It isn’t because they just have a lying issue. There’s a core belief or two underneath that habit, and it’s wreaking havoc on the way they naturally operate. So in our youth group time, let’s be youth pastors who spend time talking about trust issues and the gospel, insecurity and the gospel, self-hatred and the gospel. Because those destructive core beliefs are what make sin so appealing or normal. They’re what makes sin make sense in the moment.
If you’re looking for a youth ministry curriculum that doesn’t skate on the surface of moral do’s and don’ts, but rather dives into the deep end of destructive core beliefs and how the gospel redeems and heals them, you’re looking for G Shades. So check out our Base G Plan and discover the G Shades difference!
And if you’re looking more specifically for youth group lessons on lies we believe, you can check out our best lessons on destructive core beliefs HERE.
Related Posts:
How to Teach Teenagers About Identity in Christ
How to Teach Teenagers About The Power of Small, Daily Faithfulness
Check out Mirage – A sermon series on exposing and rejecting destructive core beliefs
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